This blog includes reflections, creative work and resources. It is a glimpse of one person's journey within the realm of inquiry, experience with the human body and spirit. Look for ideas rather than answers. No claims are made. Perfection is not implied. I write as inspired to do so. Take what works for you, leave the rest. If you share anything from this blog, either verbally or in writing, please do your best to give credit where credit is due. Thank you for visiting.

Thursday, June 28, 2012

On Being Clouded By Personality Patterns

Here it is again:  I'm wavering today between what I feel to be Truth and Freedom and the deep patterns held in my personality.  It is a wave of a closing-off squeeze with a sense of ahhhh... there it is, who I truly am, a child of God if you will and the ability to see others as indeed children of God, making their way through life here on Earth!

I grew up rather fast, having a certain amount of responsibility without power to maneuver through. When my feet hit the ground upon adulthood I engaged with power, became very responsible for myself, for others and overextended my time and energy for years.  [The jury is definitely out on causes but I did come down with a deadly cancer by age 37.]  Although I'm getting out of the enabling business, I find myself occasionally livid with other people's behavior.  This, of course, comes from my fantasy that others are actually going to meet my expectations.  Now, STANDARDS ARE GOOD.  They tell us who fits and does not fit into our lives and to what degree.  What I need to navigate is the minefield of emotion during the decision process.

So... today I'm in the muck and the sunshine.  There is a waving between love, truth and understanding and the basics of navigating my way in life, deciding who is to be part of mine and to what extent.  My choices are for the greater good:  inner peace. 

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